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Shipping & delivery
This item will be posted to you by Kloak Candles within 3 days of receiving payment.
| Shipping destination | Cost | Additional items |
|---|---|---|
| United Kingdom | £0.00 | |
| EU & Northern Ireland | Doesn't deliver here | |
| United States | Doesn't deliver here | |
| Rest of the World | Doesn't deliver here | |
Kloak Candles started in my kitchen in Bournemouth with a love of cosy spaces, funny labels, and gorgeous scents. I wanted to make candles that didn’t take themselves too seriously — ones that could make you laugh while still filling your home with a truly luxurious fragrance.
Every candle is hand-poured in small batches using 100% natural soy wax, eco-friendly materials, and vegan-friendly fragrance oils. The amber jars are recyclable (and can even be returned for a discount on your next candle), and each one is made with care from start to finish.
What began as a creative hobby quickly turned into a passion for crafting high-quality, sustainable candles with a bit of attitude. Whether you’re treating yourself or gifting someone a giggle, Kloak Candles are all about comfort, character, and candles that actually say what you’re thinking.
Safety information
To get the best from your candle and keep things safe, please follow these simple steps: Always trim the wick to around 5mm before lighting. Allow the wax to melt evenly to the edges on the first burn to prevent tunnelling. Never leave a burning candle unattended or move it while lit. Keep away from drafts, pets, children, and anything that can catch fire. Do not burn for more than 4 hours at a time. Stop burning when about 1cm of wax remains at the bottom. Place on a heat-resistant surface and keep the jar free from debris such as matches or wick trimmings. Following these guidelines will help your candle burn cleanly, evenly, and safely every time.
You have 14 days, from receipt, to notify the seller if you wish to cancel your order or exchange an item.
Unless faulty, the following types of items are non-refundable: items that are personalised, bespoke or made-to-order to your specific requirements; items which deteriorate quickly (e.g. food), personal items sold with a hygiene seal (cosmetics, underwear) in instances where the seal is broken; digital items.
Please note that if your order is being posted outside mainland UK, you (or the recipient) may have to pay customs or VAT charges and a handling fee. The seller is not responsible for any charges or fees that may incur.
Full description
If you were born anywhere near Christmas, you already know the pain of unwrapping one sad joint birthday and Christmas present while everyone else gets two. The Obligatory Joint Birthday & Christmas Present candle is your moment of revenge — a funny, handmade gift designed to make every December baby feel truly seen. Equal parts sassy and sentimental, it’s the perfect pick-me-up for anyone tired of being an afterthought during the festive chaos.
Hand-poured in Bournemouth using 100% natural soy wax, this candle blends humour with craftsmanship. Each 150ml amber glass jar offers up to 30 hours of burn time, filling your space with luxurious fragrance and the sweet smell of justified pettiness. It’s a unique Christmas or birthday gift for her, a hilarious Secret Santa idea, or a little treat to remind yourself that you deserve better than a joint present.
Every Kloak Candle is made by hand — melted, poured, labelled, and packed by one girl (me) in her kitchen. Using vegan soy wax ensures a cleaner, longer burn with zero black soot. The amber glass jars and aluminium lids are fully recyclable, and you can even return your jar for 50% off your next order.
Choose from six luxury fragrances to match your mood: from rich Tobacco & Oak and sweet Marshmallow to zesty Lemongrass & Ginger or comforting Vanilla. Funny on the outside and premium inside, this candle is the perfect combination of sass, scent, and self-care — handmade, heartfelt, and a little bit savage.
Designed by Natalka in Bournemouth
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